Twins

“We’re twins,” The Lord of the Manor declared, scanning my outfit with serious displeasure. We were both wearing pale blue jeans and a white t-shirt. Harmless enough, I thought. Some couples see matching outfits as a demonstration of their attachment. Some even do it on purpose! Not us. No Siree. We must NEVER go out dressed the same.

“Change your top,” he requested.

“Why should I change?” I countered. “It doesn’t matter that we’re both wearing white t-shirts.”

“Fine then. I’ll go change.”

Bemused, I watched him go, but promptly put him on the spot when he returned (now wearing a black t-shirt) as to why we couldn’t go out wearing similarly coloured clothes.

“You’ve seen people wearing those brightly coloured Ken Done woollen jumpers?” He began.

“Yeah.”

“Well.…. they look like idiots.”

“We were hardly wearing electric green tracksuits circa 1982,” I flounced before a wicked smile crossed my face. “You’re thinking of ‘Kath and Kel’ from Kath and Kim, aren’t you?”

When his lips pressed together, my smile widened.

“So when we dress the same, you think we’ll be compared us to certain characters and laughed at.” I started backing toward the wardrobe. “So…. if I go put on a black t-shirt too…. People will think we’re Danny and Sandy?”

“Stop it.”

“Or if we both put on red, people might think we’re Mr and Mrs Claus.”

“I’m not joking. Cut it out.”

“I know. I know,” I jumped up and down. “You go put on a green t-shirt and I’ll wear pink, and let’s see if we’re mistaken for Kermit and Miss Piggy!”

And just like Kermit, The Lord of the Manor dropped his head and sighed. Pity he wasn’t wearing green. Really did look just like him!

Blonde on!

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